SEX, MONEY, FAME, AND PERSONAL TRAINERS

Don’t try to deny it. Men always crave them…

Sex… Money…

and Fame.

You wouldn’t be totally wrong if you called us a bunch of animals. We’ve fallen for the shiny lifestyle of movie stars, footballers, celebrity trainers, and millionaires, which has in turn led us to compromise our better lives and forfeit cultivating the character of a real man.

The fact that our clients rave about our physical prowess doesn’t help matters much. Verity over at News Hub referred to this phenomenon in her racy blog ‘Why Are Personal Trainers The New Sex Gods…

If you are curious, I hold a slightly different perspective.  

Until now, your beliefs about sex, money and fame are, in fact, a lifelong accumulation of confusion.

You might think sex, money and fame is one thing, but it’s actually another. I admit, that may be an unpopular perspective, but if I knew then what I know now, I would have chased something totally different.

Money, in fact, does not solve everything. Or anything, really.   

I’m willing to risk telling you something that you might not like (and believe me, I would’ve probably been the same, as more money meant everything to me). If just one person out of everyone who reads (or skims) this takes what I say and makes the changes necessary, the risk was worth it.

Back when I was first trying to sort myself out, I went looking around for “man stuff” and nothing was ever available. It was all smoke and mirrors.

Still reading? Good. It probably because you’re interested in what else I’ve got to say or you still need a little context.

This next part is for the latter, because I have yet to convince you of this.

The way you currently think about sex, money, and fame will seriously make you an unhappy, lonely, cash strapped individual. When I say “you” I am, of course, talking about me, but I am also talking about you.

I can talk about you because of experience. Here’s where it all started… I’ve kept this version kinda clean, maybe in a future post I’ll add the unedited version… 

Exposure to Porn

Forget school. My “sex education” classes came from porn. My “mature” father thought it was a good idea to show me porn at 9 years old. It was just another night drunk for him, but it began to shape the kind of man I would become.

You might think showing porn to a boy is harmless, but it is not.

I totally degraded women from this point on. Not clients, of course. Girlfriends and hook-ups, mostly. It became an act of winning the “love” or sexual favour of someone — nothing else. Even when I thought I was in love, I still degraded women (if you are anything like me, you fell in love a lot of times).  

Porn is really bad education, especially when you are young and inexperienced.

The desire porn creates will always leave you unsatisfied. I wasn’t addicted to porn; rather I was in a way traumatised and conforming to my father’s unhealthy habits.

Add to that some more “fatherly” advice. Don’t ever trust women. There are too many of them to just settle with one. Years on years “playing the field” really frigged up my brain chemistry.

A sexually obsessed personal trainer is not essentially different from a person addicted to drugs or alcohol. Both have lost control over their faculties of reason and willpower.

Over to you…

Have you ever been truly faithful to your girlfriend(s)? Do you always desire something better, or something else when in a relationship?

Say an opportunity comes up to go out with the lads. You go, because there’s always the fear-of-missing-out on strip clubs, threesomes, or just empty casual sex. It doesn’t matter if you have a client at 6am — you do it.

Staying in a relationship just because…

Easily influenced by the lights, the cars and the lifestyle footballers portrayed

I will tell you this. I lived like a footballer (just without the actual football).  

I’m not so sure if this was the case for you, but most personal trainers have some kind of history with a chosen sport. Mine was football.

Those that don’t quite fulfil their dreams of playing at a professional level, for whatever reason, tend to end up in the fitness industry. It’s a natural exchange, but there’s also a natural problem.

Everything I thought football would do for me, everything I needed football to do for me, was no longer available. I had to find alternative outlets.

I was still trying to prove to the world that was good enough — grieving without realising it. Add some immaturity to that mixed up world, and I found myself chasing all the wrong things in the wrong places, pushing harder and harder, no matter what.

I was convinced that in order to live the life I wanted, I would need money, and lots of it. Like f-you kind of money. But, the game of chasing money is endless. And it only results in one thing.

Greed.

The lust of money make us slaves.

More importantly, it shines a light on our true weakness: our self worth. Most men see the worth of their manhood in terms of money.

As some say, “The love of money is the root of all evil.”

Your turn again…

Honestly, how much of your time do you spend thinking about money?

Do you worry when you have it and and when you don’t?

Do you even worship what money can do?

One last thing before we move on. This unhealthy mind of yours is only ever going to attract the same kind of woman, who are perhaps more defective than you. They are more defective than you because they are attracted to this lower version of the true you.

Afraid of connection, intimacy and love

Before I sign off, a couple of things I have said might be misleading (slightly), in that footballers, movie stars, celebrity personal trainers and millionaires have the fame, the money, and the sex, but what it means to them is so very different than what it means to us. We’re different animals.

It comes down to our greatest fears: connection, intimacy and love.

I’m conscious of the length this blog post is becoming. When it comes to personal trainers and gym owners, this really requires a full book of its own.

Here’s the kicker. Let’s admit it: you turned to the fitness industry because it gives you a level of control, approval and/or the security you can’t get anywhere else.

You simply haven’t put enough thought or effort in other areas.

If you want a to read more about this now, I recommend that you go and read this post over at the Men’s Movement: “Why Are Men Afraid Of Healthy Women.”

Conclusion

At my absolute worst, I did everything in my power to manipulate my ex’s to leave me, left women pregnant, kept relationships at a distance, even nearly killed myself drunk driving, all because I was trying to escape. At that time, I wasn’t self aware. If we were friends at that time, I would have told you that I simply needed a night out, to blow off some steam.

Trust me, you don’t want even half of this to happen to you. There is no way you’ll ever be able to focus on what you really want with this stress hanging around. All of this, and putting on this show, only made me weaker as a man.

It really is time for men to come forward and be men — especially in the fitness world.  Our world must have them, women anxiously seek them, and children desperately need them.

The only thing women want men to be is men. And the only thing most men desire to be is men. (from Communication, Sex & Money)

Most men do not understand what it is to be a man. That’s what Fit Man is all about: a conscious platform, a brotherhood to help you get rid of what’s standing in your way to becoming the man you know you are, and to help you redefine your current beliefs, values and standards so that you can get there on your terms.

When you find love and romance and are truly open to them, a whole set of new emotions will be released capable of driving you to super achievements in all areas of your life.

Your Journey

So things are little trickier now that you’ve read this? There’s a way to make your journey easier, and it may even help you find that special someone even quicker.

I was bad. Maybe you were were/are just as bad. Do you have a crazy story to tell about your addictions to sex, money or fame?

 

If you liked this blog post, then you’ll love this…

Subscribe to the Fit Man Times Newsletter and never miss a blog, a podcast episode or many other cool things that only subscribers get access too…

THE REAL REASONS YOU HAVEN’T FOUND LOVE

They say love sets you free. If so, why do so many Personal Trainers get in their own way? Notoriously, we create “blocks” which limit our ability to have a deep, meaningful relationships.

We’re a weird bunch, us fitness fanatics. It’s a chicken and egg situation. The fitness world either attracts a certain kind of person, or it totally makes us this way.  

My clients often share intimate details of their broken life beyond the walls of the gym. Some tell me it’s their lack of control when it comes to sexual urges. For others, they lack a well-defined purpose in their career and life. Or, more unsettling, they’ve allowed bad influences during childhood to continue to define them. Across the board, there’s a poverty of ambition to chase what they feel they deserve.

I was the worst version of all of that. Thinking back now, I would never have dreamed this was was me just a few years ago. I’ll spare you the story of me crawling out of  the Platinum Lace Lap Dancing Club, with a girl on each arm, though with my then girlfriend at home naively waiting for me.

I share this to give hope to those who need it. If I can change, you certainly can. I  wasn’t just broken when it came to relationships. Everywhere, I was a piss-ant. Biblically bad. Rebellious. Idolatrous. Lost. Enslaved. Disobedient. Egotistic. Dishonest. Adulterous. And, in case I haven’t bench pressed this point enough,  ‘dead’ of love, intimacy and connection.

When I did something, I did it until it absolutely breaks me. I couldn’t just have wandering thoughts about hot girls. I had the urge to find one.

But don’t let the lime light fool you. That’s precisely where it starts. Yeah, the money comes, the fame comes, but is escalates from there. You think you’re going up, but you’re actually going down.

If you can relate, even in the slightest from what I described above, or you’re putting a great deal of effort into the wrong relationship (always on the lookout, thinking there is better yet to come…), and you’re unsure of what to do, I’m here to tell you that the change starts with you.

It’s got nothing to do with your partner. Well, some of it might. If she is attracted to this weaker, lower version of who you are now, she certainly won’t be attracted to who you will become!

At the root of all this is identity. Do you know who you really are, at the core? Nothing happens by accident. Feel free to use any fumbles, insights, tips, half-baked experience, pseudo-wisdom, or pure honesty from my past to shine a light or hold up mirror to your life. Self-awareness can come from anywhere, even from an old PT like me.

“Self Awareness” is one of those terms thrown around too much by the so-called personal development prophets out there. Like Tony, I’m no guru, but we both have the thousand yard stare from our share of life’s firewalks.

So what is self-awareness? Everybody has a different take. For what it’s worth, I have mine, which may be useful to you. To that possible end I’ll include a few questions below which I’d be honoured if you found the time to answer in the comments section.

If you already know me and want to get to know me better, or it just feels like you are in the right place, you can jump right into the passenger seat, fasten your seatbelt, and supercharge your journey of self-discovery by requesting a 90 minute personal Discovery Coaching Call now.  

You can stick around and read on, of course. Hesitation in the face of a solution might keep you in the vast majority of people who continue to fail at relationships.

I have had the privilege of analyzing the fitness industry for 14 years, working closely with male personal trainers, celebrity trainers and studio owners whom were classed as ‘failures’ in relationships (myself included).

My observations proved that there are more causes to failing relationships than the blocks which I sketched out earlier:

Some tell me it’s their lack of control when it comes to sexual urges. For others, they lack a well-defined purpose in their career and life. Or, more unsettling, they’ve allowed bad influences during childhood to continue to define them. Across the board, there’s a poverty of ambition to chase what they feel they deserve.

I found there’s at least 26 more!

For some, the major block is a lack in capital (“My personal training business barely survives month to month, how on earth will I be able to afford raising a family?”), then when uncertainty is added to that, such as the fear that you won’t be able to provide the very best for your partner, it get’s messy. You tell yourself, “that’s the minimum she deserves!”

Then, there’s the block of regret because you’ve chosen the wrong partner, but stay in due to shame or guilt. There’s also the issues of trust and control (the unhealthy reasons you were attracted to the fitness industry in the first place!).

Try going through the first 5 blocks on the list. Measure yourself against them. It will help you to discover how many of these causes of failure stand between you and real love, romance (and epic sex)! You can indeed transform any block into a more powerful emotion capable of driving you to new levels of happiness and achievement.

Prefer to go deeper right away? Consider filling out this Personal Discovery Questionnaire, and schedule your call here.

 

  1. What was the general atmosphere in your home when you were a child (including parenting and relationship between your parents) and when / how did this change?
  2. Do you have any physical or emotional scars? What are their stories?
  3. Have you ever put much thought, energy and focus into deciding who you would like as a mate? If not, why? What’s important to you about the type of partner you want?
  4. Who would you not want as a mate? Get your checklist out.  List characteristics, style, attributes, mindset, purpose, values, interests, nationality, etc.
  5. In an ideal world, would you like to be living your ideal life right now? Is there anyone or anything that you feel powerless over? Who or what is running your life?

This not helping? Or am I boring you. You just want the Sex, Money and Straight Up Power don’t you?

I get it. I did too.

Then you might want to go and read the untold version of this. There is a story for everyone here. Maybe, even a private video showing lots of girls fuelled with Vodka … at The Encore Las Vegas.

 

 

If you liked this blog post, then you’ll love this…

Subscribe to the Fit Man Times Newsletter and never miss a blog, a podcast episode or many other cool things that only subscribers get access too…

3 Fatal Mistakes Keeping You From Beating Your competition

You want to beat the competition. I’ll show you how. Let’s begin with a “shameless” boost from a happy client of mine:  

FULL DISCLOSURE: This is a shameless advert for something that preoccupies much of my life now….

I called Joe Hanney.

He answered all my searching, skeptical questions.

I joined his establishment.

The rest is history and hopefully will remain that way.

I am fitter, thinner and stronger than I have ever been.

Would I have done this without this place…? The honest answer is … I don’t think so. Whatever results I have achieved are not solely mine, but theirs. The process has been sweat and definitely some tears. Mostly my sweat & tears — and sometimes theirs — as I am probably the definition of difficult client, yet they never gave up on me!

Here is the reality check…if you want to join a gym where you turn up when you feel like it, stroll on a treadmill or read a book on a bike, then I strongly suggest you DON’T join. Firstly, because there are no bikes or treadmills! And secondly, because this experience is not for you. It takes hard work and commitment. However, if you want a tailor-made nutrition and exercise programme which recognises your functional limitations and behavioural issues with food and you are prepared to do what it takes… keep reading  

This is MY gym. They work for ME. They adapt what they do to get me the results I want, and the rest is up to me. I’ve had constant advice and support (weekly semi-private personal training and one-to-one discussions on progress and challenges). Those of you who know about my gym habit sometimes question the fees I pay. My philosophy here is that “you get what you pay for”. I have probably spent thousands in gym memberships and weight loss programmes in the past, yet nothing else has been successful for me….until now.  

I’m not where I want to be yet in terms of weight, inches and functional fitness but I’m the furthest along that I’ve ever been…thanks to U Fit Studio  

Here endeth the sentimental journey….thanks for reading!

Apsara Leslie

 

There are literally hundreds more client success stories like this (a tribe which called themselves “U Fitters”).

As for me, I have muscles, but I’m no academic.

Actually, I dropped out of University while studying Sport Science. I was way too focused on football rather than my studies.

That was probably why I only came out with C’s and D’s. PE was my highest grade (a B). The only real qualification I held as a personal trainer was the Level 3 Certificate In Personal Training (okay, I had the Les Mills RPM Certificate, too).

And to cut a long story short, despite all that, I managed to become the founder of the multi-award winning U Fit Studio, an innovative, results-driven personal training studio. It commanded high membership fees, but wasn’t in a big city, as you might imagine. It was in Leicester.

Leicester! Of all places!

Never heard of Leicester? You are not alone. Leicester wasn’t even a blip on the radar until last year (2016), when Leicester City won the Premier League title for the first time in their history.

It was a feat even more miraculous than the Chicago Cubs finally winning the World Series over in America!

And in Leicester, I didn’t have the title award winning team to help me make a name for myself. Instead, I was competing against:

  • 12 other personal trainers at the mega-gym Greens Health & Fitness (now Nuffield). They had 5,000 members, where at any one time 600 people would be on the floor. When 13 trainers are competing for them, it was slim pickings.
  • 49 other gyms within 12 miles, all with a minimum of 5 personal trainers each (a total 245 other personal trainers)
  • Two private hospitals offering weight loss services and advice
  • More than a dozen GP clinics offering weight loss advice and medication
  • 41 Weight Watcher meetings
  • Lighter life meetings every day for 365 days of the year…
  • Also, Slimming world… and other weight loss classes

Google “Weight Loss Leicester” and there are half a million results. Google “personal trainer Leicester” and you’ll get 7,840,000 results.

 

Despite all of that, I decided to take the leap from a commercial gym to my own private studio, in the little of Leicester, in a saturated market.

My studio wasn’t in some high-end affluent area or even a sweet spot in the city centre. It was on a rural industrial site, which wasn’t really even fit to host a factory warehouse, let alone a boutique personal training studio.

On that site, there were many buildings, ugly and run down. Not only that, but you couldn’t even see U Fit Studio from the roadside. You had to go searching for it, and there wasn’t even a sign posted.

 

People would constantly ring us and ask, “Where are you?! I’ve driven up this road a thousand times!? In this business, first impressions are important, so this difficulty for clients was a big No-No, especially considering how saturated the market was. I was already fighting for a limited market, and now I was asking them to pay higher fees and drive out to the boondocks, only to get lost?

The building and piping was old. The landlord was fraudulent. Parking was sketchy at best. Some of these huge big box gyms have spaces for 100+ cars. The so-called plush studios in town boasted private lots. Us, on the other hand, had space for 10 cars (see picture). Yup, that was it. Just down the side and to the rear.

Alright. You have the picture. But why did I start this blog with a client testimonial?

Well, it was my hope that by painting a honest picture of how the odds might have been stacked against us to even survive, let alone thrive, you can set out to do whatever you want to do. By removing the excuses, you can take on the market, from anywhere.  

In whatever situation you find yourself in now, if you follow the 3 Simple Steps below, you’ll also have the best chance to also thrive!  

To really bring the point home:

  • Leicester was voted fourth lowest level of disposable income in the UK
  • A national report in 2015 stated Leicester is the poorest city in the UK
  • In 2016, the average income was only £12,071 per person

Eek. That’s only £1005.91 per month.

Despite that, I still managed to thrive off a business model where I got more money from fewer members. I took on 4850 fewer members than the commercial gyms.

Now, you’re probably thinking “yeah Joe, that’s great to hear, but even though your story inspires me and all of what you’ve said describes me now and that I’m up against, it’s tiring, and I fear I’m not going to last in this industry…”

I hear you, I really do.

So, I’ve put together a list of the most common mistakes I see personal trainers and small gym owners making. You can use this article as a checklist and see if you’re making the same mistakes.

Then using the solutions I’ve shared, try and fix these issues as soon as possible.

Now, just because you might be making these mistakes, it’s not the time to get defensive and take any of this personally. I mean, okay, get defensive, but let it go, so that you can move on and get on with it.

Despite what your perception might be of those who have achieved great things in the industry, it’s not different for them. They get defensive, too, as do I.

They’ve been here, done that. Got the shirt. They realised (just as you will) that mistakes are part of growing. As long as you learn to persevere at an even higher level, and allow time for things to take its course, it will all start to fit together.

I want you to fix this more than ever. Bear in mind that this is in no particular order and it is a helicopter view, but it all matters.

You’ve continued to replicate and duplicate already dying fitness models.  

Just because every other trainer is doing 1-2-1 training, and charging by the hour, doesn’t mean that you have to.

Just take a look at the research mainly by Carron and Spink (1993) in which I must thank Jacque Crockford for… whom also wrote a brilliant article on ‘Discovering the benefits of small group training‘ 

Why do clients hire you? To achieve results. But how can you possible do that if the hard evidence suggests that clients are more likely to stick to their programs if they’re in a group setting?

Because it gets results, a group model increases client retention. And retention puts more money in your back pocket, and for less working hours.

Take this for example:

Let’s say the client chooses to train once per week.

1-2-1 Training Model

Pricing

£50 per hour, or £600 for a package of 12 sessions

You have 21 clients. That’s 21 hours per week, yielding £1050 per week.

That’s £4,200 per month.

Stay with me.

Small Group Training (3 clients per hour)

Pricing

£120 per hour (£40 x 3), or £1440 for a package of 12 sessions

You have 21 clients. That’s 7 hours per week, yielding £840 per week.

That’s £3,360 per month

Hang on a minute Joe, you said I would earn more!

Yes, that’s right. You will!

With the small group training you are working 7 hours week instead of 21.

So, if you did small group training and you increased that to 21 hours per week, it would look like this:

£120 (3 clients @ £40 each) x 21 hours = £2,520 per week. That’s £10,080 a month.

But what other benefits are there?

  • More opportunity for client referrals
  • Tighter schedules mean clients work around your diary
  • The power of influence. If one client drinks a post-workout shake, others will too because they don’t want to feel left out. That’s more upsell.
  • Greater gravitational pull for clients to stick with you means you worry less about searching for new clients or whether you’ll have enough money next month
  • Plus much more…

Adapt to your clients wants and needs, not what the other trainers are doing.

This leads nicely onto the next mistake…

 

You have no personal brand

It makes no sense to me to call yourself a “Personal Trainer”.

Yes, if all you want to be known for is someone who can count from 10 to 1 backwards, be my guest.

When a potential client thinks of a personal trainer, what crosses their mind?

According to Paige Waehner, there are 10 reasons why people are afraid to hire a personal trainer:

  1. It costs too much
  2. I’m too overweight and out of shape
  3. I don’t know what to expect
  4. I’m afraid it will hurt
  5. I’m afraid of an injury
  6. I have personal trainer or gym trauma
  7. I’m afraid of failing
  8. I’m afraid of committing
  9. I’m afraid of looking like an idiot
  10. I’m afraid I won’t like my personal trainer

So, this is not a good advert.

How, do you differentiate yourself from all the other personal trainers in your town?

The strategy right now is the cheapest fee gets the client.

How many enquires have you received that begin by asking what your prices are?  

I know what you’re thinking; you can explain how different you are if you get a chance to speak to the prospect.

I fear not. I could send a mystery shopper to you right now and almost predict word-for-word how the conversation would go.

We’re just scratching the surface here. We’re talking about a failing title that the failing fitness industry demands that you should adopt …

Time to do something different.

But first, what does Personal Branding actually mean?

I like how Neil Patel put it:

Personal branding describes the process by which individuals and entrepreneurs differentiate themselves and stand out from a crowd by identifying and articulating their unique value proposition, whether professional or personal, and then leveraging it across platforms with a consistent message and image to achieve a specific goal. In this way, individuals can enhance their recognition as experts in their field, establish reputation and credibility, advance their careers, and build self-confidence.

He also shared another great resource, Andrew Cooke.

The end goal is then to create a unique value proposition.

And to begin that process, Andrew Cooke, from Growth & Profit Solutions, suggests that you ask yourself these two questions:

People “buy” you – so how do you differentiate yourself from others?  What can you do to attract the people you want, and to be attractive to them?

If you take a look at his site, he takes it a whole lot further.

Bottom line is:

  • Who are you?
  • What is your story?
  • Why did you really get into the fitness industry in the first place?
  • Who gives you the most personal satisfaction to help?
  • What do you want to be known for?
  • Who gets the best results or positive change when you help them?
  • What strengths do you possess, what skills do you need to acquire?
  • What are your core values, rules, beliefs and standards?

Once you can answers these questions, the personal branding process can truly begin.

What you’ll then quickly realise is that once you figure out who you really are and what you have to offer, you have something that no one else has. You are truly unique. You have a story. Use that to differentiate yourself and create new demand. Do your thing, and leave the competition to copycat one another and fight over the same clients.

Why do you think I attracted middle aged women, slightly overweight, who had put their life on hold, barely surviving to bring up children on their own who over time lost confidence in themselves, questioned their self-worth and practically given up on life…?

Because I knew who I was. I owned my story.

When visiting my website, people wouldn’t see a list of qualifications or how self centered I was. Rather, they’d see that I built something my ideal clients would want to buy!

 

You’ve never hired a coach for yourself.

And for that reason, you don’t appreciate its full power or recognise the impact it can have on people’s lives, including your own

Let’s say your client comes to you to lose weight.

How many times have you helped such a client lose weight and they are still unhappy for whatever reason?

Or, I’m guessing it is very rare that you even got a long enough chance to help them lose weight? Before you know it, they decided to not continue. They become demotivated, or other things got in the way.

What motivates one client will be completely different from the other.

How do you communicate differently and effectively to ensure all clients reach their intended targets?

To be truly outstanding at getting your clients the results they want is to have your current beliefs, rules, values and standards challenged.

Why?

 

Well, you entered the fitness industry to help other people attain their health and fitness goals, but did it occur to you that it may have been also about healing yourself?

Now that I’ve brought these 3 Fatal Mistakes into your awareness, do question them, and evaluate what you are currently doing and what needs to change.

How many of these are you falling prey too? What do you plan to do to fix them? Have you already fixed them, and if so please comment below, so that other trainers can learn.

 

 

If you liked this blog post, then you’ll love this…

Subscribe to the Fit Man Times Newsletter and never miss a blog, a podcast episode or many other cool things that only subscribers get access too…


Six Books That Will Change The Way You Think About Being A Personal Trainer

Here’s a cliché: I have muscles, but I’m no academic. Actually, I dropped out of University while studying Sport Science. I was way too focused on football rather than my studies. That was probably why I only came out with C’s and D’s. PE was my highest grade – a B. The only real qualification I held as a personal trainer was the Level 3 Certificate In Personal Training. (Okay, I had the Les Mills RPM Certificate, too).

I wasn’t born with a silver spoon. Daddy never set up a trust fund. Or trust, for that matter. Both parents were of the die-hard, working-class stock. Apart from a few quid playing football, and a few more slaving in the factory warehouse of Next, I was poor. In between not studying and not-really-working, I found books.

This “love of books” started a long time ago. It wasn’t instilled in me by my parents. No John Keating-style teacher who “reached me” and awakened a deep yearning for knowledge.

I suppose I always had the ability to make good judgements and quick decisions. And at some point, despite being unacademic, I was able to add 2 + 2 together: reading books helped me make good judgements and fast decisions. The lightbulb moment: the more books I read, the better my judgement and decisions.

The brightest bulb came later: better judgments and decisions helped me make more money.

I was prepared to take risks because it made perfect sense to me. Reading books and using the author’s’ ideas would increase my knowledge. I could then combine this knowledge with my own experience and perspective. This would help me to become more successful.

Reading a book by someone with 20 years of experience helps me to increase the depth of my knowledge by 20 years in just the space of a week. Reading five books over the space of five weeks would give me 100 years of experience. The math sounds crazy, but it’s true.

Most trainers focus on how to become more qualified in exercise and nutrition. I took a different path and chose to study business. I learned about all the key things that a personal trainer needs to make themselves a success: business, marketing, sales and leadership. I read the autobiographies of successful entrepreneurs like Richard Branson, from cover to cover, in order to absorb their secrets.

Reading helped to give me a better understanding of my personal training business, which consistently turned over £100,000 to £200,000 a year. I did this by training only 70-100 clients. I worked as a trainer only 4 hours each week, to keep my head in the game, but had my team do most of the work.

I realized through my experiences, and by reading, that clients don’t see personal trainers as what they really are: a business. No client in their right mind would cancel a doctor’s appointment or refuse to pay their mortgage. Why should personal trainers allow clients to cancel at a moment’s notice or fail to show up at all?

So, yes, I read a lot of books. I am currently reading four: Ego is the Enemy: The Fight to Master Our Greatest Opponent, The Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear and Take Life to the Next Level, The Total Money Makeover: Classic Edition: A Proven Plan for Financial Fitness, plus As a Man Thinketh: Classics Book All Time. I read one book a week over the course of a year. It’s added up. 350 books in the past several years.

Six of those books changed the way I think as a personal trainer. In the same way that reading amazing books allows me to quickly absorb years of knowledge, I find it’s also helpful to get access to the reading lists of other people. Not every book is a winner. And you could waste a lot of time chasing wisdom in the wrong places. I’m 100% sure these books will enrich you in ways you never thought possible:

Think and Grow Rich

It is said that Napoleon Hill has made more millionaires than any other person in history. “Think And Grow Rich” has also created hundreds, if not thousands of motivational speakers. All the books I’ve read by great authors such as Dale Carnegie, Ken Blanchard and Jack Canfield are explicitly influenced by Hill. This book is bedrock. Not to be missed.

The E-Myth Revisited: Why Most Small Businesses Don’t Work and What to Do About It

The time-for-money trap makes you value wealth over your personal life. This was the book that taught me that. Change your way of thinking about your personal training business, and create something that makes you rich without sacrificing all of your time. I highly recommend “The E-Myth Revisited”. I read it in a day as I was between clients, back when I worked 40 plus hours a week.

The Magic Hundred: How to Break Away from the Crowd and Go From Serial Goal Setting to Serious Goal Getting in Just 100 Days!

My dreams of becoming a professional footballer had slipped away. This book made me think big. I lost the despair and was empowered to live big once again. Sentences like “how to break away from the crowd and go from serial goal setting to serious goal getting” got me back in the game, albeit a different one.

This book asked me to do unfamiliar things. I remember lying in bed trying to be quiet, as I still shared a bedroom with my brother in our parent’s council house. I was creating a list of goals. God knows what kind of goals I was writing but one thing is for sure: it certainly made a difference in how I went about life. Hill says, “whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe it can achieve.” The Magic Hundred helped me believe it.

Awaken The Giant Within: How to Take Immediate Control of Your Mental, Emotional, Physical and Financial Life

A well loved classic. Completely changed the way I thought about how personal trainers coach their clients. The book is littered with inspiring and thought provoking quotes, like this ringer: “changing an organisation, a company, a country or a world begins with the simple step of changing yourself.”

Results Fitness Ultimate Fat Loss Programming

I couldn’t leave out Alwyn and Rachel Cosgrove. These two people have helped me in more ways than they know. I consider myself a great salesman, leader, influencer and performance specialist. However, as I was shifting from being a personal trainer to a business owner, I was in the dark. Alwyn and Rachel was there to guide me.

Secrets of Closing the Sale

This book includes more than 100 different ways to close a sale depending on the situation and 700 thought-provoking questions to use with your prospects. You’ll also find suggestions from a hundred of America’s most successful salespeople.

Not only did Zig Ziglar do a great job at showing me the importance of selling, but he also made me realise that the fitness industry is doing a bad job at selling: trainers are making the quick sale and forgetting about their clients afterwards. (This book is also recommended in one of the modules of our PT Studio Growth Lab Course).

These are just 6 from the 350 plus books I’ve recently read. I haven’t mentioned the courses I’ve completed, or the guests I’ve interviewed on the Fit Man Collective Podcast. Just not enough room to share all of them here, but I’m confident that with these 6 books, you’ll begin to think differently. Prepare for your worldview to be upended.

Are these books already on your list? What did you get out of them? Have a book which rocked your world. Let us know in the comments below.

Reading books can fast track your experience level and wisdom. So can meeting a mentor. Just a 90 minute call with an experienced mentor can shave weeks off your personal development time. Book a call with me to accelerate more of the gains which really matter.

34 Quotes For PT’s In Their 20’s

This year I turn 34 (on April 25th) I thought, hey, how about I whip up 34 quotes which have inspired and moved me in profound ways. I know, I know, there are probably way too many Insta-quotes out there, most saccharine sweet and overused. Yet, given that, I don’t judge. Words and quotes cliche to one person can be the holy gospel to another.

I’ve grown and developed more in the past 4 years than I have the previous 30. I really stuffed things up in my 20’s, which left me behind the curve when it came to the most important things in my life.

Life is good now, but hasn’t always been.

There’s a lot of inequality and suffering in the world, so when someone achieves a good life, when they make it, I believe — and I hope you do too — that there’s a strong responsibility to tell your story and reveal your path, so that others can take what they need and apply it to themselves if they so choose.

So, it’s in that spirit, in my 34th year, that I choose to wear my heart on my sleeve and share what I can, with you and your path in mind.

I really wish my earlier self-had been more open to considering the deeper meaning behind the following quotes. So in the hopes that one of these might land well with you and, perhaps, trigger a more enlightened personal development journey sooner, I leave you with what I believe are 34 pieces of gold:  

  1. Don’t get complacent

“Complacency is man’s biggest weakness. It creeps upon us when we least expect it.” – Jay Mullins

  1. Learn how to listen

If you don’t listen you don’t sell anything” – Caralyn Marland

3.  Read a lot of books, and create your own library

“The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you’ll go.” – Dr Seuss

Learn about the 6 books that will change the way you think about being a personal trainer by clicking here

  1. Be smart with your money

“Rich people stay rich by living like they’re broke. Broke people stay broke by living like they’re rich.”

  1. Learn who you really are

“It’s impossible to have a clear sense of what you want out of life if you have not deeply defined the person you want to become.” – Joe Hanney

  1. Travel

“It leaves you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller.”

  1. Get to work

Denzel Washington – Fall Forward

"You will lose. You will embarrass yourself. You will suck at something." – Denzel Washington Create The Life You've Always Wanted: http://bit.ly/goalcast-create

Posted by Goalcast on Sunday, 26 February 2017

 

  1. Find true love

“Men prosper when they devote, become loyal and learn to trust.” – Joe Hanney

  1. Be open to more hardship

“Be thankful for the hard times because they have made you.” – Leonardo DiCaprio

  1. Study Buddhism

Buddhism to me is the training of the mind.

“The mind is everything. What you think you become.” – Buddha

  1. Freedom of Choice

“Nothing will make you happy until you choose to be happy. No person will make you happy unless you decide to be happy. Your happiness will not come to you. It can only come from you.”

  1. Meditate

“Quiet the mind and the soul will speak.” – Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati

  1. Find your purpose

“The two most important days in your life is the day you were born the day you find out why.” – Mark Twain

  1. Take 100% responsibility. Always.

“More people would learn from their mistakes if they weren’t so busy denying them.”

  1. Set high standards

“Don’t lower your standards for anyone or anything. Self-respect is everything.”

  1. Challenge every belief you think is true

 

  1. Inspire

The mediocre trainer tells.

The good trainer explains.

The superior trainer demonstrates.

The great trainer inspires.

  1. Hire a coach

Learn my 7 reasons why it is important to hire a coach through my free video series by entering your name and email below:

Why it is important to hire a coach



 

  1. Be present more

“The future depends on what you do this moment.”

  1. Act of kindness

“You never know when one act of kindness or one word of encouragement will change a life forever.”

  1. Be grateful

“When you are grateful, fear disappears, & abundance appears.” – Tony Robbins

  1. Step outside the four walls of the gym

Where a fitness professional’s true character and worth is built.” – Joe Hanney

  1. Pain

“The cure for pain is within the pain.” – Rumi

  1. Ego

“Big egos are big shields for lots of empty space.” – Diana Black

  1. Let GO

“One of the hardest lessons in life is letting go. Whether it’s guilt, anger, love or betrayal. Change is never easy. We fight to hold on and we fight to let go.”

  1. Comfort zone

“Get comfortable with uncomfortable.”

  1. Death

“We all die. The goal isn’t to live forever. The goal is to create something that will.”

“The trouble is you think you have time.” – Buddha

  1. Persistence

“Ambition is the path to success. Persistence is the vehicle you arrive in.” – Bill Bradley

  1. Life

“Deliberately seek the company of people who influence you to think and act on building the life you desire.” – Napoleon Hill

  1. Selfish

 

  1. Uncertainty

“When it feels scary to jump that’s exactly when you jump. Jumping will free you from all the pain and angst you have in your life.” – Joe Hanney

  1. Role Model

“Men, your sons will grow up to be like YOU. Your daughters will grow up and marry men like YOU.”

  1. No limits

What would you do instead, if there were no limitations and no consequences to not being a personal trainer?”

  1. Cake

“Is for life not just for birthdays.”

 

Okay, it was a bit cheeky to add in quotes of my own, but hey, it’s my party, and what’s the point if we’re not having fun doing what we do, right? I think the larger point here might be that we should all aim to live lives worth quoting about, to do what you do with such verve, purpose, and passion, that you simply can’t help writing quotes about it, and to do so with the humble intent to inspire others to live more now.

Everyone, I believe, has someone looking up to them for wisdom and advice. You have someone, I’m sure. If you were to come up with a quote right now for that person, what would it be? It doesn’t have to be sexy. Just make it from the heart, and leave it below in the comments section.

 

 

If you liked this blog post, then you’ll love this…

Subscribe to the Fit Man Times Newsletter and never miss a blog, a podcast episode or many other cool things that only subscribers get access too…

 

A NEW WINNER: A PERSONAL TRAINER VS FIT MAN

Whatever it takes to find the real you, don’t be daunted if the rest of the world looks on in shock.” Stephen Richards, author

We all like to think that we know everything about ourselves. In reality, the chances are that it’s not as much as you think. Many personal trainers are living a life of illusion because they are happy to settle for less, instead of maximising their true potential.

On the other hand, A Fit Man knows exactly what he wants: he turns his hopes and desires into action and results. The key is that he is able to think with clarity all of the time. His clear mind enables him to approach every situation with 100% confidence.

In my experience, most personal trainers are unable to set goals for themselves, despite advocating this approach for their clients. Others will blindly follow the SMART method without achieving the results they actually desire. Can you honestly say that your clients have ever achieved life-changing results by using the SMART method?

More importantly, have you?

This is not going to be an article about goal-setting. Instead, I’m going to show you the barriers that keep you from finding yourself. I’ll also show you how you can remove those barriers and, if you so choose, become a Fit Man.

What Gets In The Way Of You Finding Yourself?

Many personal trainers tell themselves that they are going to set clear goals for the days, weeks and months ahead. However, people often let their fears get in the way of doing this effectively.

Lots of personal trainers do not have a clear idea of what they want out of life. They are unsure about relationships, money, business and many other important areas.

Ingrained patterns of behaviour are another barrier that prevents you from truly getting to know yourself. Your behaviour may be influenced by your family, friends, or the society around you.

For example, you might have grown up in an environment where people dealt with emotional or physical problems through a combination of drink and drugs. Or, you might live with people who turn to comfort eating in times of stress.

You may be influenced to do the same in a bad situation, rather than thinking with near 100% clarity (like a Fit Man does). Under stress, the Fit Man is able to use adversity as a motivational tool. Are you ready to live the life that you want? Here’s how a Fit Man finds out who he really is.

Forget About Goal Setting, Initially

The first thing that you need to do is forget about goal-setting, at least at first. This is a flawed system which can sometimes create more problems than it solves.

Too many trainers rush into this without having a clear idea of what they want. The goals that you have always had in the back of your mind will have altered beyond all recognition by the time you have found out who you really are.

Goal setting without discovering your true identity is only going to lead to disappointment further down the line. If you have always measured yourself by the goals that you set, then now is the perfect time to reverse that process.

Challenge Your Assumptions

Too often, we make assumptions that cause us to think or act in a negative way. One of your desires might be buy a sports car in the future, with the money that you earn as a successful personal trainer.

There is nothing fundamentally wrong with this, but why do you want a sports car? You might think that this is the only way that you are going to attract the woman of your dreams. Or you might think that your friends will judge you for having a less desirable car. Both of these are negative reasons for owning a Ferrari or a Lamborghini, so reconsider your motivation.

A Fit Man is able to constantly challenge himself over why he thinks or acts in a certain way. This allows him to strip away all of the unnecessary assumptions in order to improve every aspect of his life.

Define The Person Who You Want To Become

Too many people define themselves by the goals that they have set. This is a mistake, because these goals might not have been suitable for you in the first place. It is important that you define the person that you want to become.

Some of you will be asking how this is possible. You need to hone in on your wants and desires in every aspect of your life, from relationships to the way that you run your business.

This is not an easy process, and it may take you some time to come up with answers that you are truly satisfied with. Once you have the answers, you will feel a sense of clarity.

Realize That This Is An Ongoing Process

You need to realize that this is an ongoing process, because who you are changes over time. Your wants and needs as a single nineteen year-old who is just starting their career will be markedly different from your wants and needs as a middle-aged man with a family and twenty years of experience in the fitness industry.

If you try to ignore this fact, then you will be constantly looking back into your past instead of moving forward. The Fit Man is able to come to terms with his past. He can use what he has learnt and experienced over the years in order to mould his future.

As he gets older, the Fit Man is able to adapt by redefining the person that he is due to the changing circumstances in his life. He is also able to challenge his assumptions without slipping into complacency.

If you follow the advice in this article, you give yourself the best chance of becoming A Fit Man. Send me a private email once you’ve done this; it’ll show me you are truly dedicated to creating a life and business you love.

Once I receive your email, I can show you how to set goals that keep you fit and inspire you to change the quality other lives around you, to protect and provide what’s necessary for you and your current (or future) family, and to attract an abundance which enables you to live and give at a level you want: no limits, living life on your own terms, creating ultimate freedom.

Let’s chat. I’ll keep an eye out for your email.

I’m A Fraud – Confessions Of A Personal Trainer

This is by far my most honest post yet. I’m sitting here drinking coffee (nothing changes there, does it?) and just thinking, thinking, thinking. I’m thinking about where my business is today and why it grew into what it has become…

Over the years, I coached thousands of clients, while simultaneously working on and improving myself. More times than I could remember, I’d tell them to FOCUS.

Focus. Focus. Focus.

I told them to focus on eating healthy and exercising as if nothing else mattered in their lives. I spouted these commandments because they were a common belief within my world at the time, not to mention the rest of the fitness industry. Popularity doesn’t makes something necessarily true.

I really thought I was helping my clients. Instead, I was creating unnecessary obstacles which actually got in the way of their success and happiness, as well as my own.

The law of attraction says, and I paraphrase here, that you pretty much can’t help but attract people to just like you.

Take the cynical belief that you just can’t trust other people.

When two people who believe that get together, logically, it’s just a matter of time before that relationship dies a horrible death, which happens when one or both of their “warning sensors” are activated. When those activate, an emotional chasm opens up between two people, eroding the connection they’ve worked so hard to build, but was doomed to short circuit.

Like I used to, you might only think in the short-term. What real chance of long term success did a coach/client relationship have? I was imposing my short term beliefs: It’s Only About Dieting and Working Out. Eventually, my clients began to think the same way that I did.

That is how I was wired. I worked in a gym 24/7. I was young. Had no other responsibilities like family and children. My workplace was home and work was my hobby. Training. Eating. Gym. Repeat.

Upon deeper reflection, I’ve learned some hard truths. First, I owe a lot more to my clients – and other personal trainers – than just workouts and diet strategies.

And I’ve come to realise that everyone goes on their own unique fitness or weight loss journey (myself included). It really is far more than muscles and “looking good”; it’s also about feelings and emotions which go much deeper than workouts and eating plans.

As fitness professionals, we have to be very careful that we don’t project and push our “stuff” (i.e, emotional and psychic baggage) to clients and people who look up to us. In a sense, our bodies have become a fraudulent way to influence people, as if the muscle means they automatically listen and follow what we do and say.

“I wish I looked like you” is the common phrase we hear that. People who aspire to be fit and healthy look to us, see our bodies, and are convinced that we know the way. What they often don’t realise is that we struggle to get our shit together most of the time. And we’re so hell bent on keeping up appearances and making money that we don’t correct them. After all, in today’s fitness industry climate, it would be financially unviable to show vulnerability.

Yes, we have the bodies and people mainly admire us for that. But, for me at least, achieving this took living in a gym 24/7 and being surrounded by gym freaks every day for the past 14 years. As personal trainers, we need to think beyond the confines of the gym, in more emotional terms, in order to help ourselves and our clients. There are three key questions to ask yourself and the people you are training:

 

What’s your lifestyle like?

What are your relationships like?

What’s your overall quality of life?

 

These are the questions that trainers should ask their clients when it comes to losing weight, feeling fitter or preventing health disease.

These are the questions I asked myself over a year ago.

I found a coach and I became committed to creating the best version of myself mentally, with the same intensity I had dedicated to creating the best version of myself physically.

And while it’s been a long process to right the ship, I’m finally at a point I’m happy with. I wish I could put into words how truly liberating it feels to have true physical, mental and emotional balance.

For the thousands of times I’ve told clients that nothing else matters and to only focus on exercise and diet … I’m sorry!

You are truly inspiring to me. I admire you for coming to me, when intuitively, I believe, you could see the cracks in my way of thinking.

Is there a lesson in that? I don’t know if there has to be. It’s just my perspective now.

I suppose the point I’m really trying to make is this: be careful of who you admire in the fitness world when seeking out help to lose weight. Most trainers (including me) don’t have it all worked out.

So, my question is: how is the fitness and weight loss industry ever going to help people become the best version of themselves if we’re not there yet ourselves?

Is this the REAL problem why the fitness and weight loss industry is FAILING?

Luckily, though, I’m embracing the journey, and on a mission to help fitness experts, personal trainers and gym owners to do the same.

Are you the best possible version of yourself right now? If so, would love to hear about what you’ve done to get there in the comments below.

Not sure if you are the top version, but are amped up to get there? Book a personal discovery call with me. In one 90 minute call, I can get you farther than what’s possible on your own in a year.

 

 

If you liked this blog post, then you’ll love this…

Subscribe to the Fit Man Times Newsletter and never miss a blog, a podcast episode and many other cool things that only subscribers get access too… 

6 Ways I Developed Confidence and Turned My Life Around

Have you now (or ever) felt angry, frustrated, limited, discouraged, ashamed, disappointed or anxious? The feelings that drain confidence. If so, I can relate.

In my case, I experienced those feelings for one reason: because I was living a life of illusion. The bubble gum psychology phrase for this phenomenon is inauthenticity. But that word is too trendy and a bit weak for what I’m getting at here. More on that in a minute.

Most personal trainers would have a hard time admitting to this. They are either aware and they don’t care or they are, in fact, aware, but their “masculinity” is getting in the way of their willingness to do anything about it.

Impossible to drain the swamp if you keep convincing yourself it’s Venice Beach.

Fast forward. Thankfully, on the other side of it now. Sure, those dark feelings swamp up from time to time. Maybe even at the same rate. But the difference now is that I stand differently. Because I stand differently, I am not controlled or limited by those feelings.

I stand as a Fit Man. It’s a stance. Where fitness is in the body and the mind. Hard muscle doesn’t mean emotional hardness. This isn’t 1950.

A Fit Man can instantly muster up more positive feelings. Yes, positive feelings. Cosmo and Deepak don’t have patents on those. Words like proactive, empowered, and committed. How about compassion and self-love?

If you are not sure where you stand, see how these questions sit.

Has life handed you some unexpected challenges and you’re not completely sure how you’ll ever recover?

Despite being a personal trainer, are you becoming less and less motivated to train and keep yourself in shape?

Do you feel that you’re stuck in those four walls of a personal training studio/gym, with less than ideal pay and no “me” time just for you?

Has anything terrible (or traumatic) happened in your life that’s made you pessimistic about designing the life and relationships you really want?

Have you settled for ‘survival’ mode and been there for so long that you don’t even think about the dreams and aspirations you had as a younger man?

Such dreams may now seem like a fairytale. But hear this. That “fairytale” is more real than the illusion you may have created inside those four walls and – to press the point even further – inside your own body. Both can be prisons.

Dreams change. Why? Life happened. It isn’t what we hoped to experience when we were younger. Our bodies stole the show (“muscle deep”). We settled for a career far beneath our expectations. We suffered financial setbacks. Heck, maybe throw in a bad upbringing, stir in a touch of bullying, an absent father figure, and a few bad relationships and it’s enough to break the wild horse.

It’s not necessarily what happens in your life that makes it good or bad—it’s how effectively you deal with what happens to you. You’ll never get rid of your challenges. When you become a Fit Man, you’ll lessen the effect that those challenges have on the quality of your life.

What do you do when life isn’t turning out the way you wanted? Do you start settling to avoid more anticipated pain? Or do you create a new plan and move forward with certainty and confidence?

If you’ll indulge me. This process began for me when I was on another night out on the town with… myself. Yes, myself. The “friends” who I thought I was meant to be out with, didn’t end up going out.

After the taste of one pint, there was no stopping me. Typical. I spiraled out of control, drank up the whole bar, and became bulletproof. I was the man. Sporting about, flashing cash, slinging drinks for nameless girls, touring the strip clubs, all while my girlfriend was at home.

The most bizarre thing was I thought this was normal. I convinced myself that this how successful, confident men behave. No need to worry about finding friends once my actual friends went home, because everyone knew me for who I was: the local celebrity personal trainer.

I drove home drunk. Killed my £35,000 car. Nearly killed myself. And felt like death the next day. Enough was enough.

I had to reassess my life. I remember sitting in the living room of the rented house I lived in with my ex-girlfriend. She was upstairs, innocent. I was downstairs, broken. I needed to get honest with myself.

I began by facing the facts. Or better yet, letting the facts face me. A Fit Man sees facts as they are, for what they are. No bullshit. No illusion. Accepting full responsibility for where you are in life and admitting that you may need a hand.

To figure out who you really are, what’s been holding you back and then identifying what it is that you’ll need to do in order to design the life you’ve always dreamed of. If your dream is to live the life I described earlier, with the booze, flashy cash and strippers, you’re in the wrong place and reading the wrong blog. Go press that weight somewhere else.

But, if you want to get real, and to have more confidence in the direction you have chosen, even when times are challenging, welcome home brother.

I’m one of those people who believe that the best things in life can be drawn to you like a magnet. This is not woo-woo “the secret” stuff. Just what can happen in a man’s life when you drop the illusions, lose the BS, and carry yourself with more confidence.

Here’s 6 ways I developed real confidence:

  1.   Self confidence starts with awareness. You can’t make better decisions until you understand why you’re making your current ones. Then, come up with a better set of strategies and habits to create the life you want. It’s a fairy tale to keep doing things you’ve always done and expect a better outcome. Dreams are where action and discipline meet.
  2. Let go of any feelings like anger, frustration, anxiety and stress as well as many other problems (even physical pain). If we don’t learn to let go of unwanted emotions, we’ll just do our best and try to escape them through other means. Like watching TV. Gorging on food. Napping when you don’t need to. Using prescriptive and illegal drugs. Over-exercising. Safe and not-so-safe sex. Cheating. Strippers. Playing slalom with your car and street posts. And a whole host of other activities designed to take our attention off what is real: our emotional pain and hangups. I talk about these extreme forms of compensation in my podcast interview with Sedona Method guru Tim McCavitt.
  3. Invest in a coach to help you identify exactly what you want in life (relationships, money, freedom). It’s hard to think big and ambitious when you’re lacking confidence and things have gone south. It’s cliché, but true: No matter what has happened in the past, you gotta force yourself to keep going. And to get what you really want in life, you have to really keep going. A coach will help you set clear goals and help you adopt winning strategies to achieve them. It’d be a waste if you were motivated, were moving, but didn’t have the map. A coach will take you off that treadmill, and will lovingly force you to control your thoughts, your emotions, and take consistent action.
  4. Body language, appearance and communication. Your body language can instantly demonstrate self assurance. Walk as if you already have control of your life. People in control are more influential. Dress the part. Look better, feel better. Even when you’re at the gym, choose clothing and accessories that fit you well, that suit you, your lifestyle, and make you look great. Speak assertively (but not like an ass). Finally, listen. Listening is an essential tool to build stronger relationships. I can’t tell you the amount of times I left a business meeting, had a conversation with girlfriend, or sat at dinner with friends, and left a good impression just because I’ve listened and genuinely found a way to be interested. The results can be astonishing.
  5. Mental ‘Strength’ Conditioning. As I was going through my transformation, I had to battle with my tolerance level for uncertainty, fear, pressure and discomfort. Even now, I have to have daily outlines to condition my mental strength for such things. During the intense years where I worked on myself, I decided to try the London Marathon. I knew this would challenge me on completely different level to what I had become used to. Yet, the benefit of setting yourself challenges like this always bleeds across to the other areas of your life. You learn to tolerate all kinds of discomfort which only helps you to move forward even more in life. What seemed like insanity before is now the norm. I’ve completed numerous 5K and 10K runs and half marathons. Next is the Bali Triathlon. Because why not. And who knows what will be next after that. And after that.
  6. Set high standards of yourself. Coaches help, but it’s critical to set high standards you arrive at yourself. Such responsibility forces personal growth. You end up ruthlessly striving to live up to your own expectations. You make quicker gains. I’ve found that when I’m under pressure (from myself) to act or live up to a certain standard, it’s much easier to accomplish goals – even the bold ones.

 

How do confidence and goals go hand in hand? Well, you must reconsider, change or adjust your current rules, values and beliefs. This requires self awareness, then setting high standards, and then respecting yourself enough to never fall below your new plateau.

So, this is where the work is required. When we are still holding on to old beliefs, old patterns, old rules, old standards and old values, hoping that confidence and new life will magically appear. This was a big blind spot for me. It doesn’t have to be for you.

If you could set one higher standard in your life right now, what would it be? Let us know in the comment section. Not sure yet? Peruse what other Fit Men say below and see what resonates with you.

Stone cold ambitious? Have a personal discovery call with Joe. Just like thousands of his previous clients, get farther in 90 minutes than what’s possible in a year on your own.

 

Six Steps To Become Wealthy As A Personal Trainer

T Harv Eker said “a lack of money is never the problem.” As I sat in the Millionaire Mind Intensive Masterclass, I shook my head in disbelief at how clichéd this sounded. “WTF?” I thought.

What I came to learn later, though, was how true this was. At the time, I wasn’t ready to accept this piece of wisdom. It didn’t make any sense to me.

In this post, I’m going to share things with you that might seem unbelievable at first. To help you avoid the same mistakes as I kept making in the past, perhaps ask “What do I need to learn?”

Such a simple question primes the mind to focus on what you want in life, rather than what you don’t want.

Let’s start with another question. What would having more money do for you? If you are anything like me, it would mean more freedom to do all the things you want to do but somehow can’t.

I believed that money would bring me happiness and give me more confidence. I felt that money could help me gain more credibility and would attract the woman of my dreams. I thought that it would be the answer to all my problems.

What is holding you back from having this amount of money? For me, I was spending more than I was making. I had no self-control over managing money. It was managing me.

I thought that this wasn’t a problem because society teaches us that debt is normal, as we go into the red on our credit cards and student loans without a second thought. I saw my own mother struggling to pay the bills, and I thought that was the same for everyone.

As problems with my finances started to mount up, I started playing the blame game. “If only I had more confidence, then I could get what I want.” My mistake was thinking that I needed money to bring me confidence when the exact opposite is true.

This attitude towards money and confidence is what I grew up with. I didn’t leave home until I was 23-24 and kept this useless mental baggage with me.

Sometimes I would become complacent, thinking that I was doing better than most personal trainers. At other times I would hit rock bottom, with zero confidence and hardly any money to my name.

Just like me in the past, most personal trainers never give a second thought to financial planning. Have you? Personal trainers usually have a one-track mind and we don’t think that far ahead. We only think about our next meal or when we are due to train next.

This one-track mentality often led me to keep my distance in relationships. How I treated myself and how much money I made for myself came first. Other people’s emotions and needs came a distant second.

This all changed when I met my beautiful girlfriend Lili. I realised that I had to change. There was no way that I was going to put her through a life occupied by stress and worrying about the next bill. I wasn’t going to let our future children experience the same as I had done growing up.

My goal with this blog post is to perhaps wake you up from the ignorance you have about your financial future. I will provide you with some knowledge and strategies that may help you take control of your money.

What Does Financial Freedom Mean To A Fit Man?

  • Living life on your terms
  • Following your dream life vs settling for less
  • Being able to dream up ways to improve the lives of others
  • Not allowing money to control you

There are six rules that a Fit Man lives by when it comes to money.

You Are Not Your Money

Your wealth is just paper, metal and plastic. Attaching emotions such as confidence, happiness, security, stability and certainty to money will only ever end in you wanting more.

As you learn more about your emotions you’ll then start asking questions about your mentality towards money. If “a lack of money is never the problem” then the issue must be internal. We can have negative attitudes to money both unconsciously or consciously, which lead us to get stuck in default patterns. These habits need to be broken if you are to have a Fit Man’s attitude towards money.

To Feel Wealthy You Need To Feel Grateful For What You Already Have

Feelings of happiness and gratitude may seem irrelevant to financial freedom, but in fact, they are critical to earning money. This is another reason why mastering your emotions is so important. You have to be able to honestly accept that you have enough just as you are.

Tony Robbins said, “Money itself is not the goal. Our worth is not measured by the weight of our bank accounts but, rather, by the weight of our souls. The path to money, the places money can take us, the time and freedom and opportunity money can bring – these are what we’re really after.”

Work Out How Much Money You Want

What’s the price of your dream life? Figure out what it would take you to be financially secure, independent and free? Don’t tell me you haven’t yet figured this out. It’s setting a goal, right? We ask this of our clients. Do it yourself.

Pay Yourself First

Think of this as if you’re investing for your future. In Tony Robbins’ new book Money Master the Game: 7 Simple Steps to Financial Freedom, he shows you exactly how saving 10% of your personal income each month helps you to gain financial freedom. This can give you a safety net whilst you are still working and help you retire many years earlier. Do give the book a read, I highly recommend it.

Stimulate Your Mind

Think about the environment you’ve grown accustomed to at the gym. You know what I mean. Being around personal trainers who are stuck in the same ways, accepting pay well below their means, can cause your mind to stagnate. Dealing with the same four walls and the same client problems can stop your creative thinking process.

Remember, I’ve been there: lacking the motivation to go in, not wanting to train clients at 6 am in the morning, knowing you’ll be finishing late at night.

You must break out of that mould. You’ve got to figure out new ways to be seen and heard in this overcrowded industry. Start getting excited again by, for example, building a business and improving your knowledge of sales and marketing.

Invest In Additional Income Streams

You rarely become financially free if you only rely on one source of income. Consider other business opportunities, and make sure that you have a clear vision for them. This stops that cycle of trading hours for money.

Remember, I cannot guarantee you financial freedom. These are the tools that you can use to achieve this. It is up to you to make it happen.

What did you think? Have any tips for financial freedom you’d like to add? We’re all in this together, and we become better, faster, together. Share what you know or what you’d like to know below in the comments section.

If you prefer, let’s talk money in private. I pride myself in quickly helping personal trainers raise their financial IQ and achieve even more gains in life. Access my calendar here.